Check!

Kourtney's Bucket List:

#57 Learn the words to Johnny Cash's 'I've Been Everywhere'

#24 Learn to snowboard

#3 Attend a Papal Mass

#18 Become fluent in Spanish

# 35468168084684 Wake up to the dulcent tones of a puppy puking...on carpet....two feet from my head....at 5:23am. -- check!

And you want to know the part that annoys me the most? Not that she chose to puke underneath my desk as far back as she could to make cleaning that much more difficult, not the fact that she chose to puke right on the rug that I had cleaned just yesterday when she had an "accident" while I was at the gym, not that she looked at me with those adorable big brown eyes right when she did it, not that I woke up to the sounds of retching...

Nope, what annoyed me the most was that it happened a full 20 minutes before my alarm was supposed to go off. Figures.

Monday: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Yesterday was just one of those days where you wake up knowing that the rest of the day is going to go downhill from there. The following is a somewhat-condensed version of my day:

- 3:57am. Wake up, realize that it's really better for my health if I skip the gym and go back to sleep. Pat puppy on the head, set alternative alarm, and fall back into a blissful slumber.

-6:27am. Wake up to an adorable puppy-face about an inch from my nose. Realize that it helps to not only set the alternative alarm, but make sure to realize that the volume on said alarm is actually loud enough to wake up to. Lack of alarm volume causes one not to wake up on time at 5:45, but rather 45 minutes later. Race around the house with a puppy on my heels, trying to get out the door.

-Forget to give dog her allergy meds. At least she got fed, right?

-Since I woke up late, I didn't have time to drink my first cup of coffee. Had to throw it down the sink and go to Plan B (Diet Coke from the fridge to drink later in the day).

-Jump in my car at 7:14 to drive to bus stop. Bus stop is 4 mintues from house. Necessary bus arrives at the stop at 7:17. Do the math. End up missing the first bus and almost missing the second. Fortunately the bus driver was either sympathetic or entertained at the sight of my attempt to run to the bus with a bag, purse, a bag of homemade muffins and coffee cup in hand while wearing 3-inch heels. Barely made it and had to endure the glares of the other early-morning-bus-commuters who scorn me for making the bus sit at the stop for -gasp!- an extra full minute.

-Get to work and start wading through the weekends accumulated e-mail pile. Set out homemade muffins, quite smug in my baking abilities.

-Realize that I spent the entire bus ride and half of my morning with my pants' fly wiiiiiiiide open. Classy.

- Put plate of muffins in kitchen, only to realize that they didn't rise, and therefore have the density of a rubber Yoga brick. Silently curse the low-fat muffin recipe from Mr. Google.

- Sit through 2-hour conference call, and graciously accept my new lengthy to-do list for the day.

-Realize that the spreadsheet I started on Friday that I believed to be half done is sadly only about one-eighth of the way done. Mentally curse my mathematical abilities and race yet again to finish the spreadsheet to send to its rightful owner.

-Eat lunch at my desk, still working on the spreadsheet.

-Change clothes and attempt to gracefully haul 5 large packages to the UPS store to be shipped. 4 of these packages are going to Europe. Am astounded at the prices UPS wants to charge for one stinkin' package ($160!!!!!), and resort to calling my boss to see if he really wants that lovely tracking feature. Get the much-nicer equivalent of "HELLZ NO!!" and resort to the good old USPS for a much more reasonable rate. Send packages and then proceed out into the crisp Fall day for my daily 4-mile walk.

-Have a lovely chat with my mom, who listens to all of my woes and offers friendly over-the-counter advice. Send up a silent prayer of thanks to God for such a wonderful mother.

-Get back to work and change into work attire. Feverishly finish spreadsheet and start working on the rest of my to-do list.

-Yeah, definitely didn't finish that spreadsheet. But in my defense, I got the whole thing sent out, and then it needed some revisions.

-Left work a few mintues late -- and when riding public transit, every minute counts. In the end, I actually made it on the bus that gets me home quicker. Then I went home, changed, threw the dog in the car for a quick jaunt to the dog park for an hour, and finally came home for the evening.

But even though there was a whole lot that didn't go well during my day, here are a few of the things that did go right:

When I got home, I got to make these:

And I had this precious little beauty who was happy to see me:

And this was the view that I got on my walk:


I guess I'll take the good with the bad. But I still wish that I hadn't woken up so late that I forgot to zip my own pants. I have a feeling that the day would have been a lot better if I had remembered that little detail.

Done with Denial

Hello, my name is Kourtney, and I'm a bakaholic.

Group: "Hello, Kourtney."

Whew. Glad I finally got that out in the open.

I love to bake. I love to cook. My favorite room in any house is the kitchen. My internet favorites folder is full of multiple subfolders, full of links to recipes that I've tried and love, or am chomping at the bit to try. I'm like a kid in a candy store when the Williams Sonoma catalogue comes out, and don't even get me started on how excited I get for family gatherings, and I get the opportunity to work some culinary magic in the kitchen.

The really sad reality is that I hate cooking for myself. In my opinion, there's nothing more depressing than cooking for one. Most of the time, I eat oatmeal, egg frittatas, or soup for dinner, simply because I can't bring myself to get the kitchen totally destroyed for one measley person. Basically, I need to cook for a group of people, a crowd, someone or something to appreciate the work and fun I had. Which may explain why I'm already scouring the internet for Thanksgiving dessert recipes to consider. Because it really will take me from now to November 26 to decide what to make.

For example: tonight my good friend B is coming over for dinner. So in honor of a dinner partner and someone besides myself to cook for, I'm making linguine with chicken thigh marinera, spinach salads, and fresh Snickerdoodles (his favorite cookie) for dessert. Tomorrow night I've already decided that I need to try a new recipe, so I'm making dinner for myself and my grandma (aka roommate). A new recipe that incorporates SO many of my favorite foods: pasta, butternut squash, BACON, and spinach. Groan. How can this not be good? Another favorite pasttime is taking an old favorite recipe, and tweaking it to (hopefully) improve it. Another example: Oatmeal cake with toasted coconut-pecan glaze became Oatmeal Apple Spice cake with Toasted Coconut-Pecan glaze with the addition of powdered sugar to make it a bit more sweet. Definitely a winner from all reports.

Anyways. I've been thinking about taking a class at our local community college, simply to learn something new, get out of the house, and hopefully meet some new people. I was talking to my mom this morning, and mentioned how much I'd like to take a community education class and started looking at the different class options. I kid you not, the first words out of her mouth were, "Kourtney, don't even THINK about taking a cooking class." See how well this woman knows me? That EXACTLY what I was thinking of taking, but considering I'm going on NutriSystem again (the last 10 pesky pounds that I didn't lose last time are going to LEAVE. FOR. GOOD.), it probably isn't a good idea to take a cooking class, where the homework involves calories that would most likely take up (semi-) permanent residence on my hips. Or at least the hips of my coworkers. I don't really see either scenario ending well. Looks like I'll end up taking a class that actually has some use in life, like caligraphy or ceramics pottery. The kind of stuff that will undoubtably be featured on the next Man vs. Wild episode.

Dear Kourtney, circa 1996

Dear Kourtney,

Yes, this is a letter from the future you. Don't ask how this works, because I don't know either. I just know that there are a few little tidbits that it wouldn't hurt you to know as you continue on this crazy ride called life. Pay attention, because these pearls of wisdom will play themselves out in your future, and you'll want to be prepared.

Costa Rica -- when you go to Costa Rica during your sophomore year in high school, DO NOT room with Amy, and don't let her borrow your stuff. And bring enough bug repellant to cover the entire group. And don't let mom talk you out of bringing your CD player, because those bus rides are long and in need of muscial entertainment.
Lawn mowing -- when dad teaches you to use the riding lawn mower, pay attention. Do it right the first time, and it'll save you a lot of eye-rolling and second, third, and fourth trips back outside to do it right.
Also related: don't chase the dog while riding the tractor. It's all too easy to run into the trampoline which results in getting yelled at by dad.
Middle School -- no other way to put it, but middle school is going to be hell. Put up with the teasing, since you'll learn a lot from it. but quit being so damn uptight all the time! learn to go with the flow without losing your own morals, mmmk?
High school volleyball -- you're going to put up with a lot of shit, especially senior year. Don't be afraid of the evil coach, and don't be too disappointed when you get put on the JV team at camp senior year. You'll be MVP and throw it back in the coaches face in the long run. Oh, and you're going to sprain your ankle REALLY bad on senior night. Don't let that get to you, either.
Choosing a college -- definitely go with UP. you'll make some of the best friends of your life there. And you'll appreciate it the most during the spring of your freshman year, when you were able to be there when Grandpa dies (hate to give that away, but at least now you know to appreciate all the time you have left)
Summer, 2008 -- go ahead and live with the grandparents, and enjoy your time at the internship that lets you graduate from college early. Living with them will be one of the hardest things you'll ever do, but you learn a lot and you become closer with mom and dad.
Comfort zone -- leave it every once in a while! you'll regret it if you don't get a chance to try new things.
college advice -- CD is a Godsend for being your math tutor. Listen to mom and dad sophomore year during the roommate fight. don't rebel as much freshman year, learn to compromise. turn on the heat senior year. appreciate the time you have there. and stay away from those delicious cookies in the cafeteria -- you'll regret it later if you don't!
eating habits -- speaking of which, you're going to get hypothyroidism when you turn 15. it messes with your metabolism, so you'll have to work twice as hard as everyone else to stay healthy. take your medicine, you'll learn to love the gym, and spinach isn't that bad after all.
moving -- you're going to move away from WA right after graduation from high school. it actually turns out to be a great thing, so embrace it! don't worry, briney turns out to be a great friend, and don't date every guy that comes along.
also, don't post important stuff that you'd rather not make public on the internet. you'd think you'd know better, but it takes a tough lesson to learn it the hard way.
spanish -- take the chance and minor in spanish in college. and don't be afraid to speak up in class, it's the best way to learn. and keep studying it so you don't lose it!
europe -- you'll study abroad in spain in college. speak spanish as often as you can't, don't eat the shrimp your host mom cooks for you, bring an extra-large USB drive, and be sure to take the earlier bus back from barcelona.

best of luck -- you'll need it

"Pimp My Bed: The Male Sleep Lair" -- SERIOUSLY!!?!?

"Bed makers are manning up.

"After years of catering to women, manufactuers are setting their sights on men. The new macho mattresses they're introducing have 'muscle-recovering properties' and cooling technology, on the theory that men are more likely to feel too hot in bed. The bed frame features built-in TV's, iPod docking stations, wine coolers, a safe, and other guy-friendly gadgetry.

"...a 33-yr.-old real-estate investor in Philadelphia, paid $30,000 for a Hollandia Internaitonal adjustable bed that offers a built-in 32-inch Sony flat-screen TV, surround-sound speakers and outlets for laptops.

"The new man-cave is the bed."



Seriously?!



I kid you not.

I'm sorry, but don't most women have a hard enough time getting their boyfriend/husband out of bed and away from the TV? In my opinion, this is either genius of the demise of the human race as we know it. Either the world will crumble since most men won't want to get out of bed in the mornings and continue their normal routine (actually, we're quite safe from this, since I didn't read where they had installed a toilet at the foot of the bed), OR it could be brilliant if the men don't want to leave their "man lair" -- leaves women to run the world!

After all, "When men get bored, they start a war. When women get bored, they go shopping."

See? I think we've found the solution to world peace, all from the comforts of our own bed/wine cooler/TV stand/iPod dock/outlet station.

Now how many do you want to bet they actually sell of these things?

pop-culture commentary -- because i know you care what i think

Totally agreeing with EW's commentary on why we love DWTS, but in this season, WHERE IS MARK BALLAS, otherwise known as the GUILTY-PLEASURE REASON I WATCH THE SHOW.
(UPDATE: Appears that Mark Ballas appeared on night two of the 3-night show, and is partnered with Melissa Joan Hart, aka Sabrina the Teenage Witch. Even though I'm not sure they'll be the team to win, they're by-far my favorite team! Thinking Aaron Carter is going to win, though...)

LOVE Glee, despite it's awkward moments, especially the Push It dance and the dancing with balloons as spacers.

J&K+8 = enough, Jon, ENOUGH. Seriously. But I loved the story that the (hopefully ex-) nanny told InTouch about how he's not that great in bed. Et tu, karma?

The New Moon stills on The LA Times website -- be still, my beating heart. But honestly, only for the ones of Taylor Lautner and his marvelous, fantastic, sizzling, eye-popping abs. -sigh-

The Emmys: thought Debra Messing looked stunning, and didn't agree with the critics hating Hayden P's dress. I thought it looked great, but maybe I'm just partial to the color red. or maybe I just don't have good fashion sense -- wouldn't surprise me.

Obama on Letterman. Seriously, dude, don't you have some better things do to rather than endorse your celebrity status? Like, running the country? Investigating the ACORN scandal (for more info, go read about it at FOXnews.com)? Getting the troops out of Iraq like you promised to do "within 60 days of taking office"? Yeah buddy, might want to get your priorities straight.

A Thought-Provoking Fire Drill

Yesterday, the building I worked in had a scheduled fire drill. However, in an attempt to prevent distrupting the workday as much as possible, they ran the drill in 2 different waves. The lower level though 10th floor went in the morning, and then 11-19 had their drill in the afternoon. It wasn't that bad, and it gave us a nice excuse to walk outside and enjoy the sunshine for 20 minutes while the rest of the floors filed out of the building.

As we learn from a young age, during a fire drill or an actual emergency, the elevators won't be in operation, so the stairwells are the only available exit. As my coworkers and I followed the herd down the stairs, I couldn't help but think how different the atmosphere would be if it was an actual fire. The panic, the stress, the worry about loved ones or the important files we left in our desks.

Then I realized what the date was. September 10th. And that tomorrow [or now, today] would be September 11. I can't even begin to imagine the panic and adrenaline that people must have felt as they rushed down the stairs, not knowing if the World Trade Center or Pentagon was going to collapse on top of them at any minute. It's at that point in your life when you realize all the things that you worried about before -- the unpaid bills, that extra 10 pounds that you're REALLY going to lose this time, trying to get the kids to soccer practice -- become insignificant. I know that if I were in that position (and thank the Lord Almighty that I wasn't, and I didn't personally know anyone who was), I would be thinking of all the things I would do, if I just had one more day. The things I wouldn't worry about, the things that I would tell my loved ones, the things that I would have wished I had been able to do.

Nine-eleven. I don't think that even 50 years from now when this date comes, I will forget to take a moment and pray for those 2,993 people who died. The firement, police officers, EMTs, and civilians who lost their lives at the hand of terrorism and hate. The people who were left behind to deal with the loss, those who spent months of their lives at Ground Zero, shifting through the debris, dreading the moment when they would find a body part and have to tell yet another family that their loved one had perished. I won't forget that when I first heard of the attacks, I was listening to the radio and brushing my teeth, getting ready for school. I won't forget thinking, "Oh, a plane crashed. Even though that's awful, they happen all the time." (I didn't yet know that they had crashed into the WTC towers). I won't forget sitting in my Spanish classroom, watching the horror unfold on the news, and my teacher asking us how many believed a war would follow this event. I won't forget looking around the classroom, and seeing 95% of my classmates raise their hands, along with my own. Or the worry that the Hanford Nuclear Plant would be a potential target. Or the pictures in the newspaper the next day, showing the smoking towers, reading about the heroic passengers who forced the highjackers to crash their plane in a remote Pennsylvania field, or the "jumpers," who would have rather crashed into the pavement below than die from the smoke and flames engulfing their offices.

America will always remember 9/11/2001 as a variety of things: the day of the largest attack since Pearl Harbor, Patriot Day, or the eveny that started the War on Terror. While I too will remember it with these labels, I will also remember it as a day to reflect on my life, and how fragile it truly is. We will always remember those who lost their lives, and those they left behind. And what we can learn from it all -- we live in the most powerful, wonderful, free country in the world. And no act of terror will ever change that.